Everybody’s got different dreams, goals, and desires for the upcoming holiday season – and not all of them involve grass fed beef gifts. But let’s say that yours is to convert your poor, skinny, wayward, vegetarian grandmother to carnivore-ism. This is the basic how-to for the easiest and most effective way to achieve that goal. (Tip: This also works for wayward vegetarian mothers-in-law or wayward vegetarian coworkers.)
In summary, according to my extensive peer-reviewed research on the topic, sending a cooler full of dry aged grass fed beef gifts (steaks, roasts, etc.) to a vegetarian’s doorstep has the effect of converting them to carnivore-ism about 99.974% of the time. Luckily for you, Tendergrass Farms offers a wide variety of grass fed beef steaks, roasts, ground beef and more – all dry aged, vacuum-sealed, and shipped right to your friend, relative, or coworker’s doorstep on dry ice. (We even offer free shipping on orders over $199.)
Step 1.) Find your target vegetarian’s home address and make sure they’re not heading out of town in the next week or so.
Step 2.) Head over to the Tendergrass Farms website and place an order of the tastiest looking grass fed beef cuts you can find. You may want to throw in some pastured pork and pastured chicken with the grass fed beef gifts. Depending on the circumstances, you may even want to place the order under a fictitious name. (We also have grass fed beef gift certificates. Though statistically not quite as affective as sending the meat itself, our grass fed beef gift cards do work most of the time as well.)
Step 3.) Within days, your soon-to-be-redeemed vegetarian target will receive a big cooler of vacuum-sealed frozen grass fed beef cuts on their doorstep. Don’t call them to make sure they got it. If you used a fictitious name, they won’t know who sent it to them. That’s part of the deal. (This helps the odds of them giving in to trying it.)
Step 4.) Wait patiently. The trick to this is that they are now alone, in the privacy of their home, with a cooler full of frozen gourmet grass fed meat. It’s just a matter of time until they give in. First they’ll start drooling, then their hands will begin to tremble, and the rest is history. Soon they’ll be wearing T-shirts that say openly carnivorous things like “Nice to MEAT you!”
Step 5.) Use a social media platform such as Facebook to share a grass fed beef recipe with the target. Watch carefully to see if they like it, unlike it, and then like it again when they think no one will notice. Watch their social media accounts carefully in the days that follow. About 87% of people who are recent converts to carnivore-ism will post pics of bloody rare steaks and juicy hamburgers within 7 days of conversion.
Step 6.) Celebrate that your long lost friend of relative has returned from the dark, protein-deprived, tofu-laden, path of vegetarianism!
Step 7.) (Optional) Repeat steps 1 – 6 as needed with other wayward vegetarians in need of real food. This is how revolutions start. Don’t ever underestimate the power of a Tendergrass Farms order.
Okay, in all seriousness, our grass fed beef is really good. Come on over to our online store at GrassFedBeef.org and take a peek at what we have to offer. Send some grass fed beef to your relatives this Christmas season. We guarantee that your grandma will smile just like mine is smiling in the photo above – or your money back!
**Full disclosure: My grandma, pictured above, is currently a vegetarian. I’ve actually not tried this yet but I’m sure it will work. I promise.
Many of you appreciate not just the quality and taste of our meats but also the underlying philosophy and that we stand for that can be summed up in the three words “Sustaining Family Farms.” I wanted to just take a moment to let you know that here at Tendergrass Farms we get calls from perhaps a dozen farmers every month who express to us that while they love farming, they are unable to find a market that will financially sustain their way of life. We are forced to turn down some farmers who would be great partners simply due our own limitations of demand. We have already sold more than twice as much of our grass fed meats in 2013 as we did in 2012 but even so there are a lot of farmers who could be supported through our online marketplace who currently are not. Here’s an email that we received this morning from one farm family that, with your help, we may be able to partner with at some point in the future:
“Dear Tendergrass Farms,
We operate a grass-based farm in Minnesota with pasture raised cows, sheep, chickens, and pigs. Our philosophy matches what I read on your website [...].
My husband and I love raising the animals but are poor at marketing. We’ve put our time and effort into our animals and pasture management and not our facilities and this year our creamery refused to take our cows’ milk based on the rundown nature of our facilities which we recently inherited (long story) even though our quality was good and our field man agreed that our cattle looked good and were healthy. We have read most of Joel Salatin’s earlier works and he has heavily influenced our thinking. Because of this summer’s circumstances we are looking at what direction the Lord would have us go since it was obviously not the direction we thought we were headed. Our sheep numbers have grown so they are a viable income source if we could do a better job of marketing. Several of our egg customers have told us we sell the best tasting eggs they have found (“Grandma, these eggs taste like butter!”, “We decorated our bathroom the color of your eggs because we love them so much (we have a variety including Americaunas), etc.) but we haven’t been able to market them enough to make money. Now we are encouraging our 11 year old daughter to take the egg business over but again we struggle with the marketing. My husband has some great plans also for a mobile milking facility which have been set by the wayside as we scrambled to work through a broken generational partnership with my in-laws. They did not share our philosophies so this seemed to be the Lord’s doing but we’re just not sure of His leading at this point.
Thank you for any suggestions or information you can send our way. Even if you don’t have any suggestions, may God bless your work. I was impressed with your Christian testimony and your philosophy.”
- Vonda S.
Franky, I’d love to be able to email Vonda back and tell her that we could help her find a market for her eggs, dairy, and lamb. For the moment, our demand for those items still isn’t quite high enough but with every purchase you make we get closer to being able to say “yes” to the scores of families that contact us every year. Thank you for your support. Please consider telling your friends about Tendergrass Farms, our online grass fed meats shop, and our vision to sustain family farms – one order at a time!
Me, David Maren, with my Tendergrass tee.
For a long time, we’ve talked about making some really cool T-shirts to give out to our fans. Well, we finally did it. Coming up with a good company to make them for us wasn’t easy but after quite a lot of searching we found an amazing little organic T-shirt company right here in Floyd, VA. The quality of these shirts is outstanding. Just for reference, this little mom and pop shirt shop (called Green Label Organic) makes T’s for REI that retail for $32 each. They’re soft, light, and 100% certified organic.
This is not your average T-shirt:
My wife, Ann Maren.
So, you’re wondering: “How do I get one of these rockin’ sweet Tendergrass T-shirts?” I’ve got good news for you. They’re free! Isn’t that awesome? With any order of $199 or more, we’ll send you a free shirt. Unlike some of our past promos, you don’t need a coupon code to take advantage of this. Just place your order for $199 or more (which will give you free shipping) and when your email receipt appears in your inbox just reply to that email with the following info:
The women’s shirts are “slim fit” so you’ll probably need to size up one size. This means if you’re a woman who typically wears a small you’ll want to get a medium. The men’s sizes are a little bit on the large side you keep that in mind as well. Note that your shirt will ship separately from the rest of your order in order to avoid moisture issues. And, of course, this is on a “while supplies last” basis.
Back with green ink (left), front with green ink (right).
The green ink is just a shade brighter than spring grass.
Back with orange ink (left), front with orange ink (right).
The orange ink is a classic pumpkin color.
Ready to place your order and get your free shirt? Head on over to our main site, GrassFedBeef.org, and load up your cart!
The following story is an illustration of one of many opportunities we’ve had here at Tendergrass Farms to prove to our customers that we really do care about them and their satisfaction with our products and service. If you happen to own or manage a business as well, I’d love to hear your comments.
A middle-aged, extremely health-conscious woman from Newark, NY who had been struggling with adverse reactions to some of the chemicals used in conventional meats products found Tendergrass Farms through a health blog a couple of weeks ago. She placed her first order on the Friday before the 4th of July (about $200 worth of meats). What the customer didn’t know, however, was that on the shipping address page she had mistakenly chosen “New Mexico” instead of “New York” on the drop-down menu of states. The city and zip code were correct but the state was wrong.
The next day, before her first order even shipped out, she placed a second order, this time for about $300 of Tendergrass Farms grass fed meat products. I believe she was just so excited about having finally found a trustworthy and convenient source for natural meats that she felt that she had better stock up before other customers depleted our stock (keeping things in stock is a real challenge for us). The same incorrect shipping address was automatically copied from her first order.
Once an order is placed on our site the file goes to our order packing software at our shipping facility in Nebraska. Our shipping software determines how many days the order will be in transit via FedEx and therefore how many pounds of dry ice must be packed with each order, depending on the ship-to state. In this case the shipping software determined that the order could be shipped via FedEx Ground to arrive in two days in NM from NE and it calculated the proper amount of ice that would be needed for that amount of time in transit. Both orders were shipped on that following Monday with enough dry ice for 2 days transit in order to arrive the day before the 4th.
FedEx, however, realized from the correct zip code and city name that the state (NM) was actually supposed to be NY so the orders were re-routed to New York automatically by FedEx. Typically NY is 3 days transit time from our shipping facility but this particular week was the week of the 4th of July so with the holiday it would take 4 days instead. (FedEx is closed on the 4th of July.) The FedEx transit time maps are very accurate and dependable and while packages may occasionally arrive late, they never arrive early.
On Tuesday morning, after the previous day’s automatic ship notification emails had gone out with tracking numbers for our customers, I got a call from this customer in NY. She said that she was concerned about her $500+ of meat because the estimated delivery date that FedEx was giving her was Friday the 5th and the packages had been shipped on that Monday evening. I pulled up her order in our system and immediately noticed her error. Both of her two large orders had been shipped with enough dry ice for two days transit time and it would be at least 4 days until they arrived at her doorstep.
“Mam,” I said, “If you log into your account on our website and look carefully at this order you’ll notice that your order’s shipping address is to ‘Newark, New Mexico.’ While I realize that this was an input error on your part in the checkout process, our satisfaction guarantee will cover this problem. We’re in the business our making it easy for you to support family farmers through conveniently buying excellent grass fed meats through our website and it appears that the poor design of our site or lack of personal attention to your order resulted in this error so we feel that we need to make this right to you. We shouldn’t have made it possible for our customers to make that mistake by neglecting to use address authentication software during checkout and we should have seen that error on our end anyway. I sincerely apologize for this error on our part. As soon as your order arrives on Friday simply give us a call to confirm that the meat was thawed out upon arrival and we’ll re-ship both of your orders free of charge next week.”
I told her to have a great 4th of July, to relax, and trust that we’d take care of her no matter what. Well, on the fourth, I noticed that she placed a 3rd order, one day before her big boxes of thawed and possibly rotten meat were due to arrive at her house in NY. At the time I didn’t think much of it but the next day I gave her a call to see how everything from her first two orders looked upon arrival. She happily informed me that FedEx had somehow managed to deliver the packaged a day early, Wednesday the 3rd, and that everything was in great shape – fully frozen upon arrival. She thanked me for my concern and my offer to re-ship the meats but assured me that nothing of the sort would be needed. When I called FedEx to find out how this had happened they had no more explanation than I did. Some kind of logistical fluke had resulted in the meat arriving early.
For us here at Tendergrass, as an organization that is committed to customer service, it was a very encouraging experience. It felt, in a very real way, like a test that we had passed. It was a very expensive test that at least this time, for whatever strange reason, hadn’t actually cost us a dime.
Milton Baucom with one of his now abandoned Tyson confinement houses, or CAFO’s, in the background.
When you come up the long driveway onto Milton Baucom’s farm in rural North Carolina one the the first things you notice are 5 gigantic galvanized poultry confinement houses. But if you were to take a moment to peek inside, you’d soon realize that they’re abandoned. If you stopped, turned, and looked a little more closely at the surrounding fields you would start to notice little flocks of pastured chickens pecking around in the grass outside, barely a stone’s throw away from the empty confinement buildings. If you looked a little farther down the field you’d even see that there are now fenced paddocks where the Baucom family’s grass fed cows are out grazing.
For about 20 years Milton Baucom and his family tried to make a living raising conventional poultry for Tyson. By the end, they were raising hundreds of thousands of birds and not even breaking even. Tyson was trying to force them yet again to invest thousands of dollars into the existing massive poultry confinement facilities that would never pay for themselves. The Baucoms knew the time had come to find a better way to feed America and make a living. They soon started experimenting with grass fed beef, pastured chicken, and pastured turkeys.
Since then, they’ve learned a lot. One of the most challenging aspects of grass-based farming is often marketing one’s grass fed meats. The Baucom family tried several different ways of marketing their meats: everything from farmers markets to wholesale accounts and restaurants. They even got a deal with Whole Foods. Some of those marketing methods have been more successful than others. Unfortunately for the Baucoms, Whole Foods required them to spend thousands on dollars of special insurance and farm inspections but didn’t offer them any stable purchasing agreements and paid them much less than what they really needed in order to survive economically in the long run.
Milton and hired hands out tending to chickens grazing not far from an old Tyson confinement house (left).
Grass-based farming is never easy. The Baucom family will no doubt have to continue to be innovative in order to keep their family farm economically sustainable. But this year, for the first time, they know that they will raise about 3,000 chickens that will have a guaranteed market through Tendergrass Farms, representing more than $32,000.00 in sure-fire sales for Milton, his wife Harriet, and their two young children. We’ve worked closely with them in the process of determining what Tendergrass Farms needs to do to ensure the profitability of their family farm, carefully analyzing the costs that are involved in raising each bird. After all, when we say that we’re all about “Sustaining Family Farms,” we really mean it!
For a complete list of the farmers who are supported through Tendergrass Farms click here.
If you’ve ever traveled much in third world countries, you’ve probably gotten sick at least once or twice from the food. And if you’ve gotten sick from the food, chances are it was probably bad meat that you ate – not bad tortillas. For a person like me who has spent years in Latin America where at times I was forced to practically become a vegetarian to avoid Moctezuma’s revenge, it’s not too hard to understand why the USDA has strict procedures and regulations that meat producers like Tendergrass Farms are required to follow. I don’t know about you, but I don’t really like getting sick.
All of that said, the regulations imposed on even the smallest grass fed meats companies are numerous and extensive, to say the least. Besides the sometimes illogical and common-sense-free requirements of the USDA with regard to the pre-butcher health of the animal, the temperature-controlled environment where we dry age our beef, and the “safety” of the final product, there are an enormous number of regulations regarding the labeling of our products. I’ll share the saga of just one Tendergrass Farms product and our quest to label it according to USDA regulations.
Back last fall we realized that there was something critical missing from our pastured pork product line: the good old fashioned all-American hot dog. But we knew that we didn’t want to make anything even remotely similar to the modern frankenfood that is sold in most stores as ‘franks’ today. We wanted to go back, way back, with our recipe to the original Frankfurter that would have been sold on the streets of Germany in the 1600′s.
It doesn’t take much historical research to figure out that the original Wieners were actually real sausages, sausages stuffed inside of real pork intestine casings. We decided to keep it basic and make our pastured frankfurters with pastured pork, salt, mustard, paprika, nutmeg, coriander, and red pepper, in real pork casings. Just like the originals, we thought it would be best to make them from good course-ground pork and sell them in the raw so that they could be cooked up at home on the grill alongside grass fed hamburgers.
As soon as I ran this new recipe by our courteous USDA inspector I knew that we’d be having lots of fun with this product’s label. He informed me that the USDA’s labeling regulations required that our product be “comminuted, semisolid sausages” if it was to have the words Hot Dog, Wiener, or Frankfurter (or any variation thereof) on the label. Comminuted? Yep. I had to look it up in the dictionary too. It turns out that it means “reduced to minute particles or fragments.” Effectively this means that I would have to make my product out of a pasty texture-less meat pulp for it to be called a Wiener, a Frankfurter, or a Hot Dog. To top it off, our product was going to be made from real pork and would therefore be a solid sausage, not a ‘semisolid,’ which further disqualified it from being called any normal hot dog names. Admittedly, the most reasonable part of their requirements was that all Hot Dogs must be sold already cooked. (I’ll agree that the thought of some poor mother giving her baby uncooked pork to gnaw on is pretty scary!)
In desperation, I started scanning the 200+ page USDA Labeling Policy Book and I came upon an entry that looked interesting:
The term “Dinner Dog” is a product of the modern food industry. It exists because companies on the other end of the food spectrum from Tendergrass are also making Hot Dogs that don’t fit the USDA’s Hot Dog definition. At least in the example from the regulation book this is because the product doesn’t actually contain meat. I checked with the inspector and we a got the green light on using this term for our new product’s label! He said we’d be good to go as long as we labeled it “Dinner Dogs – Pork Sausage.”
That all went fine with our first batch of Grass Fed Franks. But then, just a few weeks ago, when we went to make our second batch of sausage there was a different IIC (Inspector In Charge) looking over our labeling. This particular inspector was clearly more read-up on the intricacies of labeling regulations than the former one and she informed us that paprika, an ingredient in our Dinner Dogs, was banned from use in “Pork Sausage.” Paprika? It turns out that paprika is sometimes used, because of its bright red color, to make old meat look fresh. It has also been used to make very fatty sausages look leaner because one can use paprika to turn cheap white lard into something that looks like an appealingly pink sausage. So, long story short, we were informed that we could no longer use the term ‘Sausage’ on our sausages unless we changed our recipe to exclude paprika.
Being a Spanish major in college, I happened to remember that the term “Chorizo” simply meant “Sausage” in Spanish. I looked it up in the USDA labeling book and – lo and behold! – I found that a loophole in the paprika ban had been written so that traditional Spanish and Mexican sausages containing paprika could be labeled legally. After getting it approved in Washington DC, we were good to go. This week we’re cutting up and packaging 21 pastured pigs (18 of which were raised on Joel Salatin’s farm) and much of it will now be labeled just as the USDA requires: “Dinner Dogs – Chorizo”.
At least for now, we think that’s legal. And our inspector has told us that as long as we have it right on the label we can call it whatever we want on our website! I guess we’ll see if that’s true or not in the long run.
This fun little 4-minute video gives you an inside look at what originally inspired us to found Tendergrass Farms and what keeps us going today. Ultimately, it’s all about sustaining family farms – one steak at a time! Head on over to our online meat shop at GrassFedBeef.org for even more info about us.
We’ll have a very condensed 1-minute version out within a few months so keep an eye out for that as well.
In America, most self-respecting, upstanding, healthy, green, grass fed, organic people don’t eat very many chicken wings – not even organic chicken wings. In fact, if you don’t frequent bars or sit around watching football much you may go years without eating a single chicken wing unless you go out of your way to make some at home.
What a shame. This recipe will rock your taste buds and turn you into a very high-class organic chicken wing fan. And I promise you, this recipe requires no television, beer, football, or deep frying equipment. In fact, I don’t even suggest that you serve it with celery sticks or ranch dressing.
Chicken wings, especially good pastured beyond organic chicken wings, are one of my favorite foods. They are not just easy to prepare and fun to eat – they’re also a good source of yummy micro-nutrients found in the soft skin, chewy tendons, and crunchy cartilage. Trust me, gnawing on grass fed bones has its benefits!
This is a pretty basic marinaded and baked chili lime beyond organic chicken wing recipe so I guarantee you that it requires no special skills. You’ll need:
Your first step is to squeeze the lime juice out of the limes into a bowl or cup. The limes are the real star of the show in this recipe so don’t skimp on them. Pre-bottled juice will work but it’s worth the work to squeeze your own.
Now it’s time to make the marinade. But first, did you know that the word marinate actually comes from the same root as the word mariner, referring to the ocean?
marinate (v.) 1640s, from French mariner “to pickle in (sea) brine,” from Old French marin (adj.) “of the sea,” from Latin marinus
So, long story short, you’re going to put your wings in an ocean of limey, chili-drenched, olive oil brine . Go ahead and mix the lime juice, olive oil, chili powder, and salt together. Use a fork or spoon to make sure that the mix is thoroughly blended. Once it is, stick your wings in a nice big zip-top bag and pour the marinade over them. Seal the bag. Slosh it all around. Turn it upside down. Turn it right side up. Then stick it in the fridge for a few hours, flipping the bag over once or twice while it’s in the fridge to help the wings marinate evenly (the longer the better in the fridge).
If you’re anything like my one-year-old daughter, Ruby, the waiting won’t be easy. You may want to consider trying to distract yourself in the meantime with a good wholesome springtime walk or jump rope routine. I like to go outside at times like this and play with my pigs in the pasture – and lucky for me, Ruby does too.
After at least an hour or two of marination, it’s time to arrange your pastured beyond organic chicken wings on cookie sheets. (Before you do so you can go ahead and turn your oven on to 375°F.) About two to three pounds fit on an average cookie sheet. Try to keep them from overlapping as that will throw off your bake time.
After about an hour at 375°F, your wings should be done. They should practically be falling apart and oozing with a perfect level of limey zing. Before they cool, chop up a nice big handful of cilantro and sprinkle it over them for a bit of extra complexity of flavor.
These beyond organic wings definitely qualify to be served as a hearty hands-on entrée that is sure to beat fried chicken wings hands-down. They’re certainly nothing to be ashamed of as the centerpiece of a healthy meal or a fun spin on a classic American hors d’oeuvre.
David Maren is a husband, father, farmer, and co-founder of Tendergrass Farms. Tendergrass Farms is a cooperative-style online grass fed meats shop that exists as a bridge between the often geographically isolated family farmer and committed grass fed meats enthusiasts like yourself. The Tendergrass Farms vision is to sustain family farms through making it easy for you to purchase their meats by taking advantage of appropriate technology and ultra-efficient transportation models that enable their meats to be shipped to fans all around the USA.
Here at Tendergrass Farms we care a lot about how our family farmers raise their pastured beyond organic chickens and turkeys out in the field. We have strict protocols that govern the birds’ welfare, their management in the pasture, and even the non-GMO grains that they have access to along with the grass and clover that they eat. But our attention to detail doesn’t stop at the edge of the field. When the birds finally leave the pasture we take great care to ensure that the manner in which our pastured beyond organic chickens and turkeys are harvested is humane and that it preserves the birds’ natural properties in terms of nutrient density, flavor, and texture. One big part of that is that we implement an air chill process instead of the vastly more common water chill process for chilling our beyond organic chicken and beyond organic turkey.
Ever wondered why we say that our beyond organic poultry is “air chilled”?
Once chickens and turkeys are cleaned and plucked it is important to quickly chill the meat to about 35 to 40° F. In the United States, more than 99% of chickens and turkeys are chilled using what is referred to as a “water chill” process. As the term implies, in the water chill process the poultry carcasses are commingled in a tank of highly chlorinated water where they sit for some time as they chill. It is important to note that while they are chilling they are absorbing water and chlorine as well as other chemical disinfectants suspended in the chilling solution.
Tendergrass Farms beyond organic chicken and turkey, however, is air chilled. This simply means that as soon as the birds are cleaned and plucked they are transferred to a specially designed room at about 35° F where air is constantly circulated. This circulating air quickly chills the meat without adding any water or other chemicals. In this manner our poultry’s pasture-perfect flavor isn’t diluted but rather concentrated as the chicken or turkey chills. This means that when you buy beyond organic chicken from Tendergrass Farms you’re just buying chicken – 100% chicken – and the same goes for our beyond organic turkey.
You might be asking yourself why big companies like Tyson, Wal-Mart, and yes – even Trader Joe’s – would do this. It comes down to simple economics. When these companies sell thousands of pounds of poultry per day, that 5 to 10% water makes them a lot of money. After all, they’re selling chlorinated water for as high as $6 or $8 per pound! Air chilling, on the other hand, actually reduces the weight of our poultry by about 5%, concentrating the flavor of the meat. Unfortunately that’s just not a cost most big poultry companies are willing to absorb.
Questions? Feel free to comment below and I’ll do my best to help you find an answer.